Tang Dynasty: Slacking off in the Imperial Kitchen, exposed by Si Zi

Chapter 23: In the sweltering summer, it's time to eat shaved ice!

The sun in Chang'an was scorching hot, as if ten suns hung in the sky, trying to roast the imperial palace into dried meat.

The cicadas on the treetops were chirping so loudly that it made one's head ache.

The backyard of the Imperial Kitchen was a dilapidated place with no large trees to provide shade, and the soil at the base of the walls had cracked from the sun.

Su Mu was barefoot, his trousers rolled up to his knees, and he carried a large wooden bucket, which he placed in the middle of the yard with a thud.

"Guy...it's so hot..."

Little Sizi was no longer acting like a princess. She lay sprawled out on the slightly cooler millstone, her tongue lolling out, like a little dog that had fainted from the sun.

The priceless Shu brocade dress clung to her body with sweat, and her two little pigtails hung listlessly.

Li Lizhi wasn't much better off.

The round fan in her hand left afterimages as she waved it, and the bangs on her forehead were still wet and stuck to her skin.

"It's so hot."

Li Lizhi, panting heavily, tugged at her collar without any regard for her image. "The ice that Father bestowed upon us has long since melted away. In this awful weather, even the ice cellar's reserves aren't enough."

It was not easy to store ice in the Tang Dynasty. It was dug out of the river in winter and stored in cellars. In the sweltering heat of summer, only the emperor, empress and a few favored concubines could get a little bit, and it was mostly half-melted ice water.

Su Mu glanced at the two "distinguished guests" who were almost roasted, then turned and went into the woodshed, dragging out a half-sack of dusty stones.

Want to cool off?

Su Mu scooped a large basin of water from the water vat, then found a small copper basin, filled it with water, and placed the small basin inside the large basin.

Li Lizhi stopped fanning herself and looked at the stones suspiciously: "What are these? Are you going to make stone soup?"

"Cook my ass."

Su Mu poured the bag of things into a large basin of water. "This is saltpeter, I got it from the pharmacy. Look closely, don't blink."

As the saltpeter was added to the water, a series of bubbles appeared on the originally calm surface.

Su Mu took a stick and stirred the water.

After a short while, the steam emanating from the basin disappeared.

Instead, a thin layer of white mist flowed down the edge of the basin and seeped into the scalding hot mud.

Li Lizhi felt a chill rush towards her, causing the pores on her arms to close instantly.

"this……"

Her eyes widened, and she involuntarily leaned forward.

Click!

A very faint, crisp sound.

A layer of crystal-clear ice flowers formed on the surface of the water in the small copper basin.

Immediately afterwards, the ice flowers spread rapidly, as if someone had cast a spell to freeze people. The basin of water that was swaying gently turned into a hard block of ice on the hottest day of the year!

The temperature in the woodshed plummeted.

The little ox, which was lying on the millstone, suddenly raised its head, its big, black grape-like eyes wide open.

She stopped complaining about the heat, crawled over on all fours, and carefully poked the ice with a chubby finger.

"hiss--!"

The little girl recoiled as if electrocuted, put her fingers in her mouth, and mumbled, "It's cold! It really is! Cold like hot!"

Li Lizhi was completely stunned.

Water turns to ice?

What kind of method is this? You can create ice just by scattering stones? If word gets out, those Taoist alchemists will probably commit suicide out of shame!

"This is... divine magic?"

Li Lizhi muttered to herself, her gaze towards Su Mu changing. This man, usually so carefree and irresponsible, unexpectedly possessed the ability to seize the very essence of heaven and earth.

"What magic? It's just a physical reaction." Su Mu was too lazy to explain and took a hammer to smash the ice in the copper basin.

Ice shards flew and landed on the hot ground, instantly turning into a puddle of water.

Su Mu scooped the pile of crushed ice into a large porcelain bowl.

This is a ready-made smoothie.

Watermelons had just come into season a few days ago, and the imperial kitchen had sent a batch as tribute. Su Mu casually took two.

The machete in his hand is not only good for chopping wood, but also for slicing melons.

Red flesh with black seeds, and juicy.

Su Mu mashed the watermelon pulp and poured it, along with the juice, onto the shaved ice.

Then she took out a small jar of goat milk from the cupboard. It had been boiled and cooled that morning, with no sugar added, just a little salt to enhance the flavor.

As the goat's milk is poured on, the red watermelon juice and white goat's milk blend together among the crushed ice, seeping into every crevice and turning into an enticing pink color.

Finally, drizzle a spoonful of golden, thick acacia honey on top and sprinkle with a handful of raisins that were dried a few days ago.

A bowl of Tang Dynasty-style "Supreme Watermelon Goat Milk Iceberg" is thus created.

A chill seeped out from the rim of the bowl, and white mist swirled around the pink hue; just looking at it, one could feel a bone-chilling cold.

"Here, one bowl for each of you." Su Mu handed over the bowls.

Little Sizi couldn't wait any longer. She picked up the bowl, which was bigger than her face, with both hands, and without even taking a spoon, buried her face in it and took a big gulp.

"Ugh!!!"

The little girl suddenly shuddered, her whole body of fat jiggling.

That domineering chill shot straight up her tongue to the top of her head, making her forehead feel like it was frozen solid, causing her facial features to contort in pain.

But the next moment, the refreshing sweetness of watermelon, the richness of goat milk, and the moisturizing sensation of honey, mixed with ice crystals, exploded in your mouth. Each bite was a satisfying crunch, a luxurious treat in the summer.

"So icy! So sweet!"

After recovering from the shock, the little ox took another big bite.

This time she was smarter. She held it in her mouth and slowly sipped it, letting the ice water flow down her throat and into her stomach, suppressing all the summer heat in her internal organs.

"ha--!"

The little girl let out a long sigh of relief, stamping her feet in delight, "I'm alive! Xizi's alive!"

Li Lizhi held the bowl, still somewhat reserved.

Seeing how much my sister was enjoying her food, and finding the coolness so enticing, I scooped up a spoonful and put it in my mouth as well.

The shaved ice melts in your mouth.

In that instant, Li Lizhi felt as if she were in the snow in the dead of winter, surrounded not by the stuffy imperial kitchen, but by the cool and refreshing Guanghan Palace.

This is so delicious!

Although the palace also has iced drinks, they're just crushed ice cubes with some sugar water. They don't taste like this at all! The milk flavor is rich, the fruit flavor is refreshing, and the key is the ice... this ice is freshly made, with a fresh and exciting taste!

"More!"

"Give me another bowl!"

The two princesses, who were used to living in luxury, abandoned all decorum for a taste of ice, squatting at the door of the woodshed, their mouths full of sweet red and white juice.

……

Liangyi Hall.

Li Shimin felt he was almost ready.

A large pile of memorials lay on the table, which was quite unsettling to look at.

Next to it was a golden basin, and the palm-sized piece of ice inside had long since melted into water, with only a tiny bit, about the size of a fingernail, still floating on top, looking rather pathetic.

"Wang Dequan, go and get some more ice." Li Shimin tugged at his collar, sweat dripping down his neck and into his clothes, making them sticky and uncomfortable.

Wang Dequan said with a bitter face, "Your Majesty, the ice cellar manager said that today's quota is already gone. It's too hot today, and the ice in the cellar is melting quickly, so we have to conserve it for the Emperor Emeritus and the Empress..."

Li Shimin felt incredibly frustrated.

Being an emperor means you can't even enjoy a bite of ice!